H.E.A.L.I.N.G.

1Lee Sungmin X Kim Sa-eun: dating confirmed (dated September 24, 2014).

SM said: “They are in the beginning stages.”

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saeundeny2SM denied, Golden Eight (her agency) denied, she denied.

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wedcom1Lee Sungmin X Kim Sa-eun: marriage confirmed (dated October 13, 2014).

wed2Date: Saturday, 13 December 2014

Place: The Raum Wedding Hall, Gangnam-gu, Seoul

5Where? Oops.

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Lee Sungmin X Kim Sa-eun: wedding invitation card revealed (dated November 13, 2014).

wedinvTime: 6.00 P.M.

Oops, I thought the wedding is going to be private? So… only the event will be private? The rest of the wedding will not? Okay. Thank you.


CHAOS. MESS.

My last post was all bullshit. I couldn’t and still cannot handle this. They fucked it all up, greatly.

THANK YOU.

Let It GO

Once again I come to my lovely book only to post about him. Oh man.

ByoPS12CIAAFflcWell, things have been confirmed—that they are officially announced as couple now. Both agencies have confirmed—well, truth just told me that the girl’s agency started the news out of nowhere—but neither the main actor nor the main actress of this PLAY has spoken up till yesterday.

Since Sept 24, 2014 (the release day of their relationship), my twitter timeline is getting so busy talking about this pretty doll named Kim Saeun. Well, talking bad about her, of course. OTL

Actually this rumour has started since the beginning of this year (if I’m not mistaken), when a bot user-ed sungmin_lee8611 on twitter tweeting about Sungmin-Saeun’s couple things and even mentioning—well, if I may call, disturbing—some Sungmin stans. And I BELIEVE THAT SHE IS THE KIM SAEUN HERSELF, NOT Saeun’s fan.🙂

How can I know? Because I stalked her day and night. lol I also found Kim Saeun’s instagram and found out that they—sungmin_lee8611 and Kim Saeun on instagram—have the same, sorry, kind of broken English. For those who are still wondering, Kim Saeun on instagram is the real her (because a musical actor or drama actor I think, tagged her a photo of her and him).

TWO. Not to be rude, but she is… not that famous to have a crazy fan to stalk her on Facebook and even stalk Sungmin to find out their couple things. I meant, even K-netizens don’t really know who she is—I’m really not trying to be rude here, really.

And today, on the first day of October, I read that she mentioned something about her relationship in an interview where SHE SAID THAT HER RELATIONSHIP WITH SUNGMIN IS A B-U-R-D-E-N.

Well, I made this post not to talk bad about her, but to talk about the truth and the reality we are seeing. For those who are still supporting them and have opposed this post, I will not jerk with your opinion.

I am against their relationship. I don’t like this girl and her behavior of showing off their couple things on social medias (fyi, she even made twitter which is claimed her ‘own’ twitter). I also asked myself—and really wanted to ask Sungmin—why he chooses this girl at the first place; how he can fall in love with this girl; does he know how she acts on social medias; how he feels right now after all the girl has done.

But hey, Ever Lasting Friends, don’t you think we should sometimes be a little bit… cruel… bad… to Sungmin, our best friend?🙂 He chooses her must be because of something we don’t see in her but he sees, right? So let him be with whatever his choice is. Once he knows she is doing no good for him, then he will let her go by himself. We don’t need to ask him to break up with her right now. Let them be first. By the time he knows what kind of girl she is like, that must be the time he finally realizes everything. By the time it happens, there we come to comfort him as best friends and cheer him up again. Let him learn a life lesson~ Let him fall once, let him lose once, for him to get the bestest for his life. All we want is his smile, don’t we?

So all we need to do for him now is to smile with him and stay beside him within the days~ ^^ <333

Hi there again! ^^

BEEN A LONG TIME. IT’S 2014 NOW! Happy new year, everybodeh! New year, new spirit! \^^/

I also want to congratulate to my forever-never-aging bias, Sungmin Lee, on his 29th year of existence! *sounds a bit strange, eh? XD* Wish you a happy merry born day! Stay cute, stay handsome, stay manly, stay pretty, stay cool, stay gorgeous, stay strong, stay humble, stay responsible, stay hard-working, stay kind-hearted, stay humble, stay down to earth, stay courageous, stay talented, stay healthy, (stay wealthy XD), and stay close to Daddy Jesus! We always pray and support you here. I always pray and support you here. Success for your musical and your later conscription!😀 We love you the way you are~❤

Okay, I want to share some things I’ve got on my holiday this term. I’ve got quite many new things I think.

First, in this beginning of the year, I’ve been feeling very irritated because of K** and E** fans. They are really annoying me! Although I’ve found (?) one K** whom I think is wiser than other K**. The way HE answered each of my questions is really wise and friendly. Maybe because he is not a girl, that’s why he is way more… how to say? Polite, I think? Other K** are really rude in answering questions which they should not have answered that way, though:/

Second, I’ve found myself hesitating about some things related to my cutie pie, Lee Sungmin. I cannot really write it here in case people will read and mean it in another way that there can be a war here -___- But I’m hoping I will get out of this shit soon >< I want to believe him fully as I how I did these past 4 years.

Third, SM Town Week SJ “Treasure Island”!! >< For Super Junior fans, ELFs, YOU-HAVE-TO-WATCH-IT. You will regret if you don’t watch it, for real! >< The best performances in my opinion so far are… KyuWook’s rap performance (best recommendation for those who are in badmood mode XD), then I Believe (second best recommendation), I like Miracle too (it reminds me a lot about Super Junior in the past🙂 although not complete members are there😦 ), then I’ve cried a lot from watching Kyuhyun’s solo performance; “Doll” (how cant I? he was like going to cry anytime ;~;), then Sungmin’s solo tooooo~❤ (I’M NOT JEALOUS, the performance itself kicked away my jealousy!), and oh! “I’ll Follow Him” or they called it “Sisters Act” where they dressed as nuns😄 HyukDong’s ballad duet is not bad in my opinion🙂 After watching Kyuhyun’s solo, go watch this! And you will try hard to stop your tears–at least, it was what happened to me who hardly ever cry. For SM Entertainment, YOU-SHOULD-MAKE-A-DVD-OF-IT.

Fourth, I found myself these days are getting close to many people! And I’m just… happy!😀 Getting to know many ELFs is interesting, though. Especially for me who will never start a conversation with other people, haha. I’m not being mean actually. I’m just… shy >< I’m worrying if the person I’m trying to talk to is getting irritated due to my action–because I don’t really like people who suddenly popped out (?) out of nowhere and trying to have a long long long conversation with me, asking me this and that to the extent I feel like I’m going to punch him.

Fifth… what again? Ah, my goal. I want to meet Sungmin or Kyuhyun or Super Junior, though. It’s my dream and I haven’t got the chance till the second I write this post. I hope someday in this year, I’ll get the chance! Amen🙂 For those who ever met Super Junior or certain members, I feel happy for you! Your hard work to meet them of course is not as easy as what people think, I know. I congratulate you! \^^/

Humm… I think this is the end of my post. It’s almost 2AM here now >< My past bad hobby (?) is back again.

Have a nice year, everybody!

It is just I’m not ready yet…

Being a pure fan is not an easy thing, I think?

You do not know what will happen the next second you open the browser and start surfing (?) about your idols.

Beside, being a pure fan means you have to be… strong?

Yes, your idols do say things like “Thank you for always supporting us, our beloved fans! We love you~”

But let’s think REAL. Do they really know our existence? LOL

I’m not trying to be mean or something, but yeah… At least, I feel that sentence.

Okay, here, let’s just say I’m being too fanatic. But it really makes me frustated!

Last few months, things keep me in mess. Hurr…

People say you have to support what your idols do, what they decide for their future. I did agree with the statement. But now, it is really hard for me to stick the sentence in my mind, why -_-

I am a fool, I know. Some people might say I’m being delusional, or even crazy.

He does not even know my existence after my four years spent on him, yet I still do things like tweeting him hundred of times saying that I don’t like his—secret—decision, or nagging in my room about him and his fan services, or being too happy just because he is too handsome that day, blablabla.

I act like I know him the best, I know exactly how he feels or reacts to some comments related to him… But who knows, maybe I am right? About everything that he did not say but I represent him.

But I bet 100% he exactly, definitely, does not know I even exist today to support him, to get sad with him, to be happy with him.

He is just too happy that he is having a girlfriend now, a person that might be her future wife, who will wake him up the way he likes every morning, who might be a mother of his children he dreams all this time, who he believes will stay right beside him in his happiness or sadness till the death parts them.

It’s not like I don’t want him to be happy.

He is a human too, a person who needs his own privacy for his living. It’s not because he is an idol that he has to live like a god who will yes all your wishes.

It’s just I’m not ready to all of this.

After my four years on him, learning about him, loving him all the way he is, it is my first time to get this frustated because of him!

Lee Sungmin, you really must have driven me crazy in these four years that I got into you this much!

YOU DO NOT EVEN KNOW ME, WE HAVE NOT EVER MET, YOU JUST DO THINGS CALLED FAN SERVICES LIKE OTHERS DO, AND YOU DO IT NOT ONLY FOR ME BUT FOR YOUR FANS ALL AROUND THE WORLD, BUT  W H Y  ? WHY SHOULD I HAVE FALLEN THIS MUCH INTO YOUR CHARM?! BAD YOU!😦

Who should I blame in this case? Me? Or you? Exactly the first person to blame is you! You spread too much charms, you show too much charisma! Then the real problem is that I fall into your charm, your charisma! All about you drives me crazy! HOW?

Lee Sungmin, just call me crazy. Yes, you have rights to call me so. I have to admit it myself LOL

But how…

You are too handsome that I cannot avoid your charm, even when I get frustated because of you like this, HOW? But you don’t even know my existence while I have been falling into you this much, HOW? And you even have got a girlfriend without knowing thousand of broken hearts outside, HOW?

We, fans, who still support you till today VS a girl that you just met few months ago in musical

Yet you still choose her, right? WHY?

If we want to, we, fans, can state that we know you more than she knows about you!

But WHY? WHY, Lee Sungmin? WHY???

You are a bad boy, do you know that?

You make us fall into your charms, stay in that charm for years, and then break us into pieces for a girl!

I am not ready yet, Lee Sungmin. We are not ready yet.

Please ㅠㅠ

You can get married, live happily with your future family, but not this fast…

You just met her few months ago ㅠㅠ

We are not trying to say that she is not a good girl, just… we want the best for our beloved ㅠㅠ

People say if you lose the person you love, then just let them be happy with others, right?

That’s what we want to do now ㅠㅠ

So please… ㅠㅠ

We do love you, we do support you, we do want the best for you, Lee Sungmin.

We are sorry for interfering in your private life too much.

But like your own quotes, “It is because you love that you worry, you support, and you want to make someone happy.”

August 1st — Happy 8th Anniversary, My Boy!

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SOS — Sea of Sisters made your debut in 2005! I watched it, I watched! ><

The ending was such sweet yet made me wanted to kill the producer! Did they become a couple at last or not? ><

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8th Anniversary…ㅎㅎ

ㅎㅎㅎ…

Time goes really fast.. 8 years went by so fast
That I don’t know how.. It passed..^^

I am having thoughts like “Have I been doing well?”..ㅋ
I’ve been running hard.. But I don’t know.. if I’ve been doing well..

Making them worn out, and giving scars without realizing..
But they remain by my side to cheer for me
The people who are strength to me
Manager, stylist..
And beloved fans..
Sorry and thank you…

Really… It’s hard to express it when you’re right in front of my eyes..
Sometimes, I am happy but I pretend that I am not..
Sometimes, I don’t know what expressions to make…

But I am really really thankful to my people
Who are always hugging me tightly..!

8 years… 8 years..

It’s not a short amount of time..  But I don’t think I’ve achieved anything great yet..
It’s nice to keep the first-mindset and work hard..

But let’s do well now too! .. Do well…ㅋ

(cr : @NKSubs via @sungminholic)

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He is too handsome today… My handsome boy ♥  ;~~~;

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Happy 8th debut anniversary, Mr Lee!

God bless you for what you have done, what you are doing, and what will you do🙂

Stay humble to everyone as you always do.

Keep smiling and stay happy forever, my boy! ♥

We love youuuuu! \[^^]/♥\[^^]/ 사랑해~ ㅋ

★Today’s Diary — [130703] Have you got a girlfriend?

It was all started when I just got home from school with a really-not-in-good-mood condition. You know what?

Was a bitch who talked and acted as if she was a queen of  some jerk, dammit!

I bumped my back against the bed. What a shit bad hair day I had just done! Facebook would make me better, I thought.

And…

This status got me up.

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First, I found out that it was about their couple *ehem* bracelets.

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Sungmin always wears it even till today—no one noticed at first, just thinking it was some attributes. I don’t know about Effie. But found some of her photos wearing the bracelet too.

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“Inikah yg namanya partner drama musical?”

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And I found this…

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But they look so in love each other… I have to admit, they match WELL

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And about this…

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Yes, it was about bracelet *again*, but this one was different. “SM ♥ JH“~ (Jihoon is Effie’s real name)

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Both didn’t speak up till today, though. But their actions show everything… Sungmin’s ring

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I don’t know… But it was just my feeling that there has something with this ring

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And recently, Sungmin has got a new tattoo on his wrist (?). It was a sentence in Spanish, “Naci para conocerte (I was born to meet you).”

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He is in love… Everyone knows that. One thing that we need now is only a confirmation from him. By the way, she is pretty… and simple… I love her~ *nodnod*

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Just wish the best for him. Although I am not that willing to… My 4-years-love ㅠㅠ